If you have just started divorce proceedings, then you know that as you go through this process, a lot of stuff is going to come out of the woodwork that you have to be prepared for.
It can be hard to understand how you came from your wedding day to being in court with your spouse and divorce lawyer arguing about marital assets and finances.
Whilst you know that something like this can be particularly hard to go through, what can make it even worse is those little things that you didn’t think would have an impact or your other half knew about, e.g. social media posts, hidden assets, spending money, and extramarital affairs (if you had one).
Nothing is safe, and before you know it you are getting printouts of your text messages and emails that you have had with people that you thought were personal.
The best way to deal with this situation is to call your local Cypress divorce attorney (or one where you are located) and get their advice on what to look out for. They will be well-informed on the types of issues that are likely to pop up during the proceedings, and you will be forewarned.
If you are about to go through the divorce process and you are worried that the previous issues will come to light that your soon-to-be ex-spouse is going to bring out, now is the time to check what can be used against you in a divorce and how you are able to navigate through that and hopefully, come out of the other side of this divorce case with your dignity and assets safe.
Social Media Posts
This is a pretty big one nowadays, as everyone seems to be connected to one or more social media platforms.
If you have has social media for a long time, then you have more than likely posted things that you completely forgot about and that you haven’t thought about in years.
Anything Can Be Used Against You
Even if you posted a joke a while ago that was perhaps an inside joke or something you thought was funny, if this looks to be something that your spouse’s attorney can bring up in court proceedings to defend your spouse, they will do it.
Things To Be Aware Of:
- Posting inappropriate pictures or descriptions of your children.
- Making negative remarks about your spouse’s family.
- Painting your spouse in a negative light online through pictures or social media posts.
- Posting photos or talking about expensive trips or items when you have previously said that you didn’t have enough money.
- Posting about drinking or taking drugs.
Any one of these can be brought up against you in court which can cause your spouse to look better in the judge’s and court’s eyes.
When it comes to children, one spouse that can prove they are the better and more reliable parent will be the one awarded child custody as they are not shown to have risky behavior.
Even if there are just pictures of children at an adult party near alcohol, this can show the spouse (whose social media posts are being used) in a bad light, especially if the other spouse did not know that it was happening or told the spouse to keep them away.
Best Way To Stay Protected Against This
Despite the fact that you think deleting these posts would be the best course of action, it actually isn’t because that can still be used against you in court.
Erasing records can be interpreted as spoliation of evidence, a serious concern when navigating legal complexities. Such a practice can invariably raise a red flag during court proceedings; an aspect of the law that your Divorce Attorney would be best placed to explain to you. Despite the temptation to remove potentially damaging content, an experienced lawyer will advise against it, as it could backfire during legal proceedings.
You may be able to not have the picture on your socials, but, if your spouse has a copy or can prove it was posted, then you are looking at more of an issue and you will not be looked on favorably, no matter what your divorce attorneys do.
Be Careful
It may seem like it is better in hindsight, but you just need to be careful about what you are posting all the time.
If you are gambling, taking drugs, or showing signs of marital waste through your social media posts then this will come back to bite you, you need to be careful so that if you do end up in court, there is nothing salacious that will follow you.
Extraordinary Spending
During your separation, if you are showing extraordinary spending, which is also called dissipation of marital assets or marital waste, then this will definitely be brought up when you get to court.
It looks incredibly bad especially if the money you are spending is for both of you to use and you are just spending it on whatever you want with purchases that cannot be defended.
Even if you think that what you are spending is fine, for example, you spent money on a vacation for the family, in court, this can be seen as extravagant spending and a waste of marital property.
What Else is Classed as Extraordinary Spending?
If you spend money on romantic relationships, business ventures, selling property below market value, transferring money or property to a third party, or doing any illegal activities such as drugs, this is all classed as marital waste.
What You Can Do To Protect Yourself
Until your divorce settlement is stamped and signed, keep all extravagant spending and purchases until after the divorce proceedings.
Do not do anything that would make you look bad in the judge’s eyes as anything too big or looks to be a bad purchase can be seen as vindictive.
For example, spending marital assets on an affair or another romantic relationship that you started during the divorce will put you in a very serious place.
If you have joint bank accounts and you are taking money out of them to do what you want, even if it is part of your money in there, this will show that you are untrustworthy with money, and you do not spend wisely which can turn the courts in favor of your spouse.
Getting a divorce lawyer who can help show you what can be considered as “careless” spending would be a good idea. It’s important to have legal counsel during your divorce process, as an experienced attorney from a credible firm like Freed Marcroft LLC (or something similar) would be likely to warn you about the things you need to watch out for during the negotiations.
Hiding Assets From Your Spouse
Both spouses are required by law to disclose any and all assets they have to go about the proceedings fairly.
If you have investments, bank accounts, property, vehicles, etc., all of these will need to be disclosed at the start.
If you are found to be transferring your money to another account to try and keep away how many assets you actually have, you won’t be lucky in getting away from this as there will be an electronic trail that can be traced back to you.
Stashing Real Cash
You may think that you can get around it by taking it out in money and hiding it somewhere else, however, whilst this may be hard to track exactly where it is, there will be ATM withdrawal receipts with how much you have taken out and when which can be used against you in court.
Any money that you have you will need to disclose so they can see if it is yours or something that needs to be shared with your spouse.
How Can You Make Sure You Are Protected?
The best course of action is disclosing everything you have to the courts, there is no use trying to hide exactly what you have as more than likely it will be found as there is always a trail that they can follow.
Special investigators can be hired to find it and there is a lot of trouble that goes along with hiding money and other assets, so it is worth it to just be upfront and make sure that you are following the law of the court.
Make sure that your spouse is doing the same too, because if they are hiding assets then you will be looked more favorably upon.
Private Text Messages and Emails
You might have thought that they were private, but there is always a trail for people to follow, and even if you delete them they can be recovered from laptops and computers via a backup or in the digital bin which you may have not emptied either.
The Messages Have To Be Relevant
However, there is a positive to this as they have to be proven that they are relevant to be brought up in court.
Some things are admissible whilst others aren’t, your spouse will have to plead their case that they are needed to prove a point or have information in that will move the case along.
If a text message says something that involves a situation that could have put someone in danger e.g. drinking and driving with their children or other minors in the car, then this may be put into evidence as a spouse endangering their children.
However, if they are just being mean about one spouse, then this probably won’t be used as evidence.
Keeping Your Text Messages and Emails Out of Court
Deleting them is not going to do much as they can still be found. The best course of action is not sending them in the first place.
You can’t take back what you have already sent and right now some may be used in court if you have sent them already, but, if you haven’t and you know that you haven’t, then don’t start now, just keep everything kind and courteous when messaging them or anyone else.
Conclusion
Now that you are aware of what can be used against you in a divorce, you should be able to walk into that court knowing what the potential outcome could be.
Just remember that divorce is going to be tough anyway, so anything that you can do to ease the time you spend in court will make it a lot better and you won’t be dragging things out for longer than it needs to be.